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The Crossline Community Groups Podcast
The Crossline Community Groups Podcast is devoted to empowering leaders who lead church small groups, providing practical tips and biblical wisdom to cultivate authentic relationships and spiritual growth among fellow believers. Whether you're a seasoned leader or starting a small group for the first time, this podcast offers valuable resources to deepen your connection with God and others.
The Crossline Community Groups Podcast
Are All Small Groups Created Equal? With Special Guest Adam Brown
Can couples groups achieve the same depth and intimacy as gender-specific groups? Join us as we answer this question with my dear friend Adam Brown, Life Group's pastor at Harbor Point Church. We discuss the natural tendency of mixed groups to lean towards social activities and how, with intentionality, couples groups can also foster profound relationships and spiritual growth. Through our conversation, you'll learn how to navigate the dynamics of these groups to uncover new dimensions in your partnership that daily life might overlook.
We talk about the benefits of different group settings, comparing the unique opportunities provided by both couples and men's groups. Hear how engaging in deep, faith-based discussions with your spouse can reveal unseen aspects of each other and strengthen your relationship. We also highlight the camaraderie and non-judgmental environment of men's groups, where specific topics relevant to men can be addressed openly. Striking a balance between these settings is crucial for personal and spiritual growth, and we emphasize the importance of including your spouse in discipleship moments to fortify your marital bond and spiritual journey.
Finally, we explore the power of life groups in fostering spiritual growth and community. Discover how these groups allow individuals to support each other's journeys toward a life centered on Jesus, despite life's challenges. We underscore the importance of vulnerability and shared experiences, highlighting the crucial role of small group leaders. With a heartfelt blessing from Philippians 1:9-11, we encourage you to let your love abound in knowledge and insight, enabling you to discern what is best and be filled with the fruit of righteousness through Jesus Christ. Tune in for an episode packed with insights and encouragement for anyone involved in small groups.
Well, hey, everyone, Welcome back to the Crossline Community Groups podcast. My name is Jordan Gash, I'm the community life pastor here at Crossline Church and I have an exciting episode for you today. I have a dear friend, Adam Brown, with me, which I'm going to introduce in just a second. But before we even get started, I want to tell you what this whole podcast serves to do.
Speaker 1:This podcast is for anybody that's out there that's either a part of a small group, leading a small group, or maybe you're a small group's pastor and we have conversations around the ministry of small groups and how to grow that, how to develop that, how to really be successful in that. And I do want to say that if you are any of those people participant, leader or pastor in this area I just want to thank you for what you do. I want to affirm you in what you do you are having kingdom impact. So thanks for stepping into that. But let's jump into the episode. We have a question that we are going to answer today with my friend Adam, and the question is will a couples group ever be as close as a men's and women's group? And let me introduce my dear friend, Adam Brown. He is the Life Group's pastor down at Harbor Point Christian Church, Not Christian Church, just Harbor.
Speaker 2:Point Church. Yeah, there you go.
Speaker 1:And more so. He's been a friend of mine for a long, long time and we've had the chance to do ministry together at the same church and just be friends for a long time. So thanks, adam for having me For having you, I can't even answer, see, that's why I'm not a podcaster.
Speaker 2:Thank you.
Speaker 1:Adam for being with us?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's been fun. Yeah, like you said, we've known each other for a long time. We got saved kind of close to each other at Coast Hills and then we grew up together, we worked together, went to school together. So now we're doing similar jobs in two different parts of Orange County. So it's fun to be in contact and have a conversation with you and discuss this topic.
Speaker 1:Yeah, We've had a lot of conversations on the phone or via text and saying what the heck do I do now?
Speaker 2:Yes, exactly what did you do? How do we move through?
Speaker 1:this. So, like I said, adam, we are going to be talking about can a couple's group be as close as a men's or women's group, or a mixed group be as close as a men's and women's group? And this all kind of was birthed out of an article I read, and the article had a lot of different things that it was saying about small groups, but one portion of it the pastor that was writing it shared about this idea that he really believed that in the process of making disciples, that a couples group can not be and as strong as a men's and women's group, saying that men aren't going to open up with women and women aren't going to open up with men, and that's just not going to happen. So let's just cut that and walk away from that and just focus only on men's and women's group. And that's an opinion and I was able to read it and hear his thoughts.
Speaker 1:But it's definitely stirred some things within me, because here at Crossline and I'm sure at Harbor Point, we have both. We have men's and women's groups and we have couples groups, we have mixed groups and singles groups and a whole variety of different groups. So, adam, why do you think this pastor would even say something like that. What would lead somebody to even believe that?
Speaker 1:a that that a couple's group can't be as close.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think it's a um, it's a good question and the article is very interesting and I think his his take on small groups is, uh, definitely an honest one and, uh, maybe maybe in blunt at times, but, um, I think it's.
Speaker 2:It's easy for people, um, in any situation, whether, whether it be um you know their daily life or, uh, something as specific as a, as a small group, that they're getting together, um, to kind of default into whatever is easy.
Speaker 2:And I think there's a tendency, uh, when, when you're kind of with your, your, your spouse, or in a mixed group and it doesn't feel maybe as focused as a men's or women's group, um, there's a tendency to kind of default into this um, maybe more of a social group or just a social gathering or something of that sort, because it's maybe not, you know, when you get, when you get all men together, it's like we, we feel as men, okay, we have this agenda, we have this task ahead of us, we have this is the point of why we're getting together Um, or or women naturally just have, you know, when they get together, have the conversations that they tend to have.
Speaker 2:Um, so it might feel like when it's a mixed group or when it's a couple's group, there might be a little bit more relaxed, a little bit more social setting, a little bit more in that context. So I think his initial kind of assessment of mixed groups or couples groups tend to default to more social side of things and just gather together because that's what they're quote unquote supposed to do, yeah, because that's what their church said to do, or their small group pastor told them to do, that they should get together once a week and talk about the Bible and all that sort of stuff. So it's easy to default in that regard. But I don't think that is true for every group. I think you can. You can stay the course and you can stay focused on on what's at hand and continue to move forward in that regard, kind of no matter what the group might be.
Speaker 1:And I do agree. I think that there is that default of going to the social, social aspect of it. And you're eating appetizers, you're playing games, you're just chatting with everybody and it does. You know, you may have a two hour long group and all of a sudden you're an hour in.
Speaker 1:You're like, wow, we haven't even talked about it yeah, exactly Because we're socializing, and I think, though, that there's a sense of comfortability in the social environment, because there is elements of going deep requires something. It requires you to be open a little bit more, you know, to be a little bit more vulnerable in your identity, and there might be, you know, discomfort or embarrassment. You know being amongst. Maybe there's deep issues that you have as a woman, or deep issues that you have as a man, or deep issues that you have as a man. I'm like man. I do not want to open up about that with someone else because of the opposite sex, because that's going to relieve me feeling bad. I don't want to feel like that and I don't know if I want to go there. So there is this comfort in just like, let's just go to the social and I'm doing what my pastor said, and I think so. I do think that there is this underlying sense of fear that sometimes drives um the lack of depth in a couple's yeah, um, and I think it's.
Speaker 2:I think it's the fear of what they're going to say tomorrow, right? So what happens in the group when I share something vulnerable tonight or vulnerable in my time together with my group, maybe in front of my spouse, that maybe I, maybe I haven't even shared with my spouse or my significant other, and then I say it because I feel compelled, you know, by the Holy spirit or whatever it may be or the conversation. I share it and then my spouse is upset with me. Or tomorrow, when I see my friends at the soccer game or the social setting or whatever it is, how are they gonna? They gonna judge me, right. So it's, it's almost this weird thinking about okay, what are they going to say next time I see them in that regard? So I think there's a maybe a little bit more nuanced experience with with a couples or a mixed group in that context, when we, when we kind of get together with just the guys there's bro code and you know what happens at guys group- stays at guys group or whatever, or maybe the same thing for women.
Speaker 2:So I think when it does get a little bit more mixed it's harder to navigate in that context.
Speaker 1:It's funny you say, Adam, like this idea of like things that you haven't even said to your spouse, especially like we're in this stage where we have young kids and sometimes like it's like ships passing the night with my spouse, and then you go have this time where you separate to have a small group with the other couples and you go to prayer requests and then you like share something and your wife gives you this eye, like what.
Speaker 1:I've been so often, like we talk about it later, but even to your point is like, what are these people going to think? But I've also thought personally. I think to myself, if I say this, of something that I'm struggling with my wife Alex what is the what the other wife think of me as a husband, and that that goes into it too. So I I do think that it there are some barriers and some challenges that come with a couple's group that may not be there, you know, really with a men's and women's group. So let's jump into that a little bit, adam, clearly we do have both in our churches. So what do you think are the advantages and disadvantages of both sides, you know, of the men's group and women's group or the mixed group and the couples group, like what's the?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I think about you know, jesus calls us to love the Lord, our God, with all our heart, soul, mind and strength. Right, that's a, that's a wholeness idea, every person, every part of who I am. So I have to think about myself as a whole person and how then I am going to be shaped, um, in the best way possible. So, in in certain areas of my life and obviously they all overlap in a lot of different ways I'm I'm being shaped as a dad, I'm being shaped as a pastor, as a follower of Jesus, as a husband, as a, as a man, as a employee. So all those things have to correlate with each other. So I think that there are pros and cons to each, because sometimes, you know, I get to have conversations specific about my marriage or about myself in in, in front of my wife, in other couples groups, and then sometimes I have conversations where I just it's a totally different conversation, where I'm just a dad or just a guy, um, having having direct conversation.
Speaker 2:In that regard, one thing is interesting in some of the groups that I've kind of helped grow through, the ministry that I lead at Harbor Point is, for sometimes that it's the first time a husband and wife have been in a group together and it's the first time they're having the depth of spiritual conversations that they're having in the group and we get spouses that walk out and go.
Speaker 2:I've never heard my husband talk that much or my wife talk that much and I've never heard them talk about those topics and I think it's just one of those things that maybe naturally at home, just because of the busyness of life or whatever it is, we don't quite get to those discussion points. But we're in a group. It kind of changes the game a little bit in that regard and I think it's. I think it's it's a significant thing to kind of be shaped in my marriage and in my parenting context through the people that are in my couples group or mixed group or whatever it may be. But at the same time you know I need that other, I need that other side of the aspect as well. So I think I answered your question. I'm not entirely sure, but I got a little distracted.
Speaker 1:No, I like it. No, what you're saying is so true, Adam, I think it's again. It's so much about where we're at in our life too is for us where you have young, young kids and we're in that season, there with our marriages, we're trying to navigate young kids and now they're starting to even get into those preteen years and teen years and stuff, and so being able to walk with other people in that is so important both sides, not just code. And there's the.
Speaker 1:There's a way that you can get to a level of depth maybe faster with somebody that is, you know like you, right and connected in that you know same, you know age a same, you know gender, same, like that whole element. So, being able to talk to just guys, I can go there faster because I feel like almost less likely to be judged, maybe, and just go that direction and they talk like me and they don't. I don't have to navigate how I'm even vocalizing things or communicating things. I could just say it because I feel like I'm talking to a guy and even the topics I could talk about I don't have to. We don't have With men and women.
Speaker 1:You don't have to waste time topping out longer topics. You could get right to like, let's talk specifically man topics, right, specifically To your point dads, husbands, right, yeah, you go that whole conversation. But you're right, I do think that there's a value, there's like a hidden treasure that I think is behind maybe some of the challenges of a couples group that you miss out on if you don't do that, if you don't step into that. I think that there is. I've heard plenty of times where I've been sitting in a men's group and somebody is telling me a story and it always comes off that he's always the good guy.
Speaker 2:Sure In this situation, right.
Speaker 1:And you're like yeah, man, like I feel you, I'm with you, man.
Speaker 2:I'm with you. We'll be praying for you.
Speaker 1:But in the back of your mind you're like I wonder what his wife would say, right? Or I wonder what his wife you know how his wife would receive what he's saying right now. There's always kind of more to the story and when you're in a couples group you almost have that accountability to just speak the whole story, yeah, or or if your story is spoken and it's not in line with what she thinks or what he thinks like, they'll let you know and there's maybe some strong fellowship that happens right in that and you work it out together as a group, and so I think that there's that benefit to it.
Speaker 1:And and the last thing, I just think, like it's I think too, when you get married and you know this, it's like we're called to be one flesh. Now it's not just Jordan, it's not just Adam anymore, but now it's us together, like it's me and Alex, and we are one flesh. She is my ezer k'negdo, my helper, suitable to help me in this journey of discipleship and growth and development as a follower of Christ, and so I. There's an element to me that goes I want her to be a part of those discipleship moments that we don't always get all day long, because, again, we're busy and it's like.
Speaker 2:So the discipleship moments are precious, and I almost want that her right next to me so that she could be hearing the same things that I'm hearing receiving and the follow-up on that is that in the context of the small group, she gets to hear whatever that conversation is, whatever that discussion point is, and she gets. She's literally the closest person to you, so proximity will dictate a lot of potential power and opportunity to have influence so she can continue to follow up on that. You and I might be in a small group and we we might go three or four days without texting each other and then all of a sudden I'll think, oh my gosh, I should text Jordan and ask him how he's doing with that, whatever that topic was. So I think there is a beauty that takes place when there is a couples group, um, and a mixed group in that context.
Speaker 2:So and I also just think you know, unfortunately this is the reality of life these days you know kind of mixed groups and singles and couples and all these different stuff, with the way the world is going Like, there are just a lot of different opportunities. It's not kind of these cute little wonderful boxes that everyone can fit in anymore. It's just a different context and a different understanding of how people get to be in community, in accountability, shaped by that process, and I think the picture we get of the body of Christ is everyone you know, from whatever background, whatever season of life, whatever situation. They get to be a part of that community and they get to be shaped in the context of that group, whatever it may be. So I remember, I think we might've even read I'll quote Doug Fields for a second, but he wrote your first two years in youth ministry and I remember in the book he said like you need Lifesaver.
Speaker 1:Yes, thank you, doug but.
Speaker 2:I remember him, there was a section that was like you need a certain series of people in your life that you can have conversation with on a regular basis Someone within the church that understands your context of ministry, that understands what you're going through. Someone that's in ministry, but maybe at another church that is doing a similar job to you, and then someone that is just a friend, that has no idea what it means to be a pastor and obviously he's talking, as you know, young youth pastors that are kind of figuring out what it means. But I think about that in my own life a lot because I think I have relationships that my wife and I have together as we grow and do life with our kids and do life with people we know. You know you and I occasionally get together and we'll have lunch or coffee or whatever it is. We go how, how's it going Like, how's life? But I have another pastor friend of mine. He's almost doing the same exact job as me, similar to you and I. He's got young kids and we get together, um, pretty much once a week and just talk life.
Speaker 2:Yeah Right, so is that? Is that a small group of sorts? Maybe not, it's a very, very small group but to the point that was made in the book was I have kind of I need these different relationships in my life to have different types of conversations, to shape me in unique ways that I might not know that I need, but as I submit myself to the group and submit myself to the process of being shaped, the different groups that I'm a part of and the different relationships I've have shaped the different aspects of who I am and help me, you know, continue to become more and more like Christ in that regard.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that's where they where, where we're going. You know, even in this conversation, you know, is this idea of there, is this beauty to the diversified experience right. That you have right. It doesn't have to be one thing or the other. There is beauty in both. And if there's opportunity for you to have both, whether it's not saying that you have to go to the men's breakfast and have a couples group and maybe your schedule doesn't allow for that, but maybe there is that guy that you connect with regularly, you know once a month, and it's just like you connect and how's life connect through those things.
Speaker 1:And or maybe it's the opposite Maybe there's a couples group that you meet with and it's a social group that you guys come together but you spend a couple hours together and you really pray together, and so there is this beauty of the diversified experience. I have a follow-up question from something we said earlier, adam, that I was going to ask you is like do you ever feel like you know you've been in a small group and there's maybe something that you and, uh, you and Jen Jen is your, his awesome wife and has been launched into a conversation that you maybe didn't know you needed to have, based off of the conversation that happened at small group, like yeah, sure, I mean that, that I think, um, I think, like you said, like maybe you say something, or you're just, I'm a, I'm a very, um, very much a verbal processor, so I'm talking out loud.
Speaker 2:You know, often, you know I've I've had a busy day. So by the time I get to small group, I'm kind of like this is my chance to kind of just process. So it's a variety of ways that it happens. Either I say stuff that I'm like oh, I, I don't know if I fully understand what I just said. Or gosh, I don't know if I like that's a conversation I should have probably had with my wife before we had that.
Speaker 2:Or I think one of the beauties of a small group and I think this can happen in any kind of variations of small group is that, um, you get launched into it because you're watching other people attempt to live the same life you are. And that's the beauty of the small group is we get to kind of everyone aims their life at Jesus and take steps closer to him. And we're not perfect. We're not when we say this all the time at Harbor Point. We're not perfect, we don't have it all together. We're aiming our lives at Jesus and continue to take steps towards him, and we need each other to do it. We need each other to go through that.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, I've sat around the table and gone, oh my gosh, like that person's being really vulnerable right now and they're actually saying things that I think if I was maybe a little bit stronger in my you know my attitude at this moment or a little bolder in my own faith, or courageous, maybe I would be saying the same things. But I'm definitely going to have a follow-up conversation with my spouse after this discussion, whatever it may be, because it's it's bringing to the surface things that I didn't know I needed to process and that's the, that's the beauty of the small group, of the other ones in the group that are that are doing that and exposing that conversation in that regard, totally agree with all those things and can definitely relate to the those converse, those post-group conversations that we like to have, but we usually get out.
Speaker 1:The problem is my wife goes to bed so early, we get out of group so late and I'm all like man. There's so many things I want to talk about. My wife is out by the time we get home.
Speaker 2:It's like I'll have to hold on to that until tomorrow.
Speaker 1:So I have to write it down in my journal and talk about it the next day. Anyways, so, adam, you're leading, obviously, life groups down at harbor point. Um, I think in this conversation we have to, we have to kind of address well, maybe the bigger, what's the bigger strategy of life groups? You know, maybe you know, for most of us that are listening here, I would say, a lot of the people that are listening are, you know, connected to cross line. I know that we have listeners out there that are not and but for, but for those for Harper point, maybe you can articulate, like, what is like the ultimate goal and strategy of groups, like life groups for you, like, as you communicate to your leadership team or communicate to a new host or a new leader, like what are you telling them? Like is the ultimate goal and desire for you as the? I think it's a.
Speaker 2:I think it's a really good question. I think, I mean, we probably could do a whole different podcast just on that topic alone.
Speaker 2:But I think when I think about it, I think about the real life conversations that I'm having with people which are just this. Last week, I met with two different life groups that I simply said tell me about your life group. And they described for 30 minutes everyone in their life group and everyone is going through really really hard life situations single mom, illnesses, divorces, unruly children, loss of job. And I, and for me, the the life group, um, you know, I think one of the big things is it helps us find creative ways to be shaped by God's word, god's Holy spirit, through the people we're in conversation with. But it is that opportunity to rely on the people around us when we have the moments that are the really really hard moments. In addition, it's those moments that we get to celebrate together. It's those people that we get to do. We call them life groups because it's we're doing life together and going through that. And I just and the one of the leaders said to me you know it's been really hard, everyone's got a lot going on. Um, you know, kind of our attendance has been sporadic here and there, and I said okay, keep going, because this is when your group needs you the most as the leader and for the rest of the group to be there, because this is when your group is really going to. You know, put rubber to the road or proof in the pudding, or whatever phrase you want to use. This is when you guys get to rise up and and and stand up and be that support to the other person in your group that can, that can help you walk in that regard.
Speaker 2:And that's, I think, the picture of the body of Christ. And you and I, as pastors, we have very similar personalities. We want to care for everyone, call everyone back, take a meal to everyone's houses and be there in every single moment. We can't do that, and it's the small group, the life group, that gets to step into those moments and care for people and shepherd them and help them, be God's presence and be there and show the care that they need in those moments of joy and happiness, and you know pain and sorrow and and stand in the gap in those moments. So I think it's a great way we get shaped and become more and more like Jesus. But I think, even more so as I'm just maybe I'm just thinking about this because of this conversations I've had in the last couple of weeks. It's in those times of need that's where I turn. Yeah, I turned to my, my small group, or my life group, to to really have the strength to continue to keep moving forward. It's good.
Speaker 1:You're pretty smart.
Speaker 2:Oh, thanks, it's good pastor.
Speaker 1:I think, well, I think kind of where we want to land on this, you guys, is because, again, most of you guys are most people listening are small group leaders, kind of maybe trying to glean some advice and wisdom on what to do. And maybe you're considering leading a small group and you're like, well, what should I do? Should I, should I step into the leading a men's group or a women's group, or should I do the couples group? And I think there's that's a decision that you ultimately need to make. But what I would say is don't, don't be afraid of the potential scary parts of a couple's group, and I do think that if you are willing to kind of try to step into that, that's something that that's where you're at in your life and your spouse is with you in that. I think that's important too as well. What we haven't addressed you know you want to be in this together. You don't want to lead a small group and have your spouse just be, not for it. That might be a good one to do a men's or women's group, but if your spouse is with you to take that bold move to step into, I think Jesus had his, his group of guys, right, he had the disciples and he was pouring into them, but I think so much of his ministry on the road had everyone I mean, I was.
Speaker 1:I even pulled up some scriptures just around this just to remind us that men and women were both there. Husbands and wives were there. Families were there. 1 Corinthians 9, 5, right that Peter had a wife. And it says don't we have the right to bring a believing wife with us as the other apostles and brothers do? So there is an element that the wife and maybe the kids, they were rolling with Peter and rolling with them and they're on the journey, and so even the process of learning and developing was there. You know, jesus talks about Luke 8 and talks about that he was traveling from village to village and there were the disciples, but then there was all these women too that were right there with them, walking with them together, hearing all the same messages that Jesus was giving. Yes, maybe there was these deeper conversations that he had with this select few, but there was all those same teachings and togetherness. And then, even as you step into Acts, chapter two, it says they were meeting in their homes, breaking bread in their homes. Well, what's in homes? Families, right.
Speaker 1:Families aren't families I'm sure there are kids, just like our homes right.
Speaker 1:There's kids running across, there's things flying all over the place, there's things breaking and families kind of having to jump into that. So it was in the midst of that early church and it was in the midst of what Jesus was doing. So what I'm saying is don't be afraid to step into that because you don't think that you're going to be able to go as deep. Yes, it may be easier to go men's and women's group because again you just jump right into it. Easier to go men's and women's group because again you just jump right into it. Maybe you get closer. But I think that there is so much there in a couple's group to that what me and adam have been talking about, some that can help you in your marriage and your development if you're willing to to willing to as a leader, to lead them past that social aspect right, he said it's the default of the social and what the guy said in the article, it just they all, they all default to the social and you can't really even get growth.
Speaker 1:It's up to you as a leader and maybe your small group pastor listening it's up to you to help, coach them and lead them past. This is just not social.
Speaker 2:We want to actually get into those topics and those discussions, but yeah, I think you know you make a great point about homes and kids and I heard a pastor once say you know, the greatest pulpit you have is the kitchen table and that's more of a family. You know. Parenting conversation, yeah, but, um, I know, as my wife and I have participated in relationships, you know it's it's sometimes difficult to find people. You and I both have three boys. You know we added a fourth baby girl at the end.
Speaker 1:Who would do that? Um that.
Speaker 2:But you know it's hard sometimes to find people that kind of run at the same speed. Your kids do, yeah. But when you do find those people and you get to build those relationships and I think that can happen through a couples group or, you know, kind of a family group together there's a wonderful benefit that takes place where my kids get another male figure and another female figure of someone else that's following Jesus, they get almost a. You know, I know a long time ago at uh, at the other church we were at, there was a group that was. It was dads and sons, and they kind of use this term that it was all like all the dads were all dads to all the sons and all the sons were all sons to all the dads. So at any point any one of the sons could call one of the dads and all dads to all the sons and all the sons were all sons to all the dads. So at any point any one of the sons could call one of the dads and go hey, I'm struggling with this, but I didn't wanna call my dad about it, so I'm calling you right. So there's this wonderful benefit that takes place when we kind of cross contaminate or get kids in the same room with other kids.
Speaker 2:I love this story. You know, when Jesus gets lost in the temple, it says that Mary and Joseph assumed that Jesus was with other relatives right With someone else earlier in the pack, and then they find out three days later that he's at the. He's at the temple. They're like, oh, we got to go back. And then Jesus has a 12 year old, has a sassy comment back.
Speaker 2:Like it's one of my favorite stories but I love the assumption in there that they've thought, oh he's, he's with someone else we trust, yeah, and I think there's a. There's a wonderful picture when it comes to small groups and life groups, that you get this mutual benefit of seeing other dads and other parents and I get to watch you as a parent and a dad and go, oh, how did you navigate that with your 10 year old that's talking back to you? Or how did you navigate that with your three-year-old that's throwing a fit right now in front of the context of other people? I get to be exposed to that and watch that at the same time. So there's a wonderful benefit that takes place in that regard as well.
Speaker 1:Well, we definitely. I know your kids, you know my kids. I think it's very clear that we reap what we sow.
Speaker 2:Yes, exactly, and it certainly takes a village to raise my children.
Speaker 1:So I'm thankful for my small group and those multiple dads and other multiple moms right, that are part of that. But, um, adam Brown is an amazing pastor down at, uh, harbor Point. That's in San Juan, capistrano, if in the Dana Point area as well. All that to say, if you guys are looking for a church, if you guys are looking to connect with a great church that's down in that area, I, harp Point is an amazing church. I know a lot of people there and know some great pastors there as well. We are going to wrap this up. I hope you guys are encouraged today. Maybe you take some thoughts, conversation points for you and your spouse to kind of go into that, and then I would even apply this there is we talked a lot about spouses. I do want to say there is some of these elements of the the mixed viewpoints and even the greater growth, even in mixed singles groups too.
Speaker 1:I mean, yes, they're not your spouse. You're not going home with that person Hopefully not. But you have that opportunity. Wow, that came out loud Things I say out loud, but those are also opportunities that you can grow together. But, adam, thank you so much. Any final thoughts before we we wrap this up and uh and bless these, these people going out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I, um, I was chatting with one of our life group leaders maybe six months ago or so and, um, they just said the success they define success in their, in their small group, as, uh, we just kept meeting. Right, we kept meeting, and I thought it was a significant statement. Um, because it's so easy just to kind of give up, yeah, just kind of throwing the towel. I can't figure out the schedule, it's not working out, or I don't like the book we're doing or I'm not, I'm not too fond of the curriculum, and they just give up. And in that you kind of isolate and I thought that the continue to get together.
Speaker 2:Right, that's a scriptural statement Don't give up meeting together. So the continue to meet together, continue to find ways to put yourself in community, find ways to let yourself be shaped by other people around you that you trust, that know the Lord as well, that you are confident that they have a head on their shoulders and continue to be a part of some sort of group in some form or fashion, whatever it may be. Uh, in the mix, so awesome.
Speaker 1:Love it. Well, as we close these things out, what we do as we always close is we just want to bless you. You know, uh, we're pastors and we want to bless the people that are out there doing, uh, the work of the ministry out there. So, uh, if you guys would even just receive this blessing, wherever you are right now today, whether it's early in the morning, it's late at night, sometime in the middle and you're just kind of busy in your day just take a break for just a moment and just receive this blessing from us. And it comes from Philippians 1, verses 9 through 11. It just says and this is my prayer that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with all the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God. Amen. No-transcript.